{"id":1273,"date":"2020-04-19T20:09:25","date_gmt":"2020-04-19T20:09:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/crimesofthecenturies.com\/?p=1273"},"modified":"2025-07-15T15:26:42","modified_gmt":"2025-07-15T14:26:42","slug":"more-victorian-humour","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/crimesofthecenturies.com\/index.php\/2020\/04\/19\/more-victorian-humour\/","title":{"rendered":"More Victorian humour"},"content":{"rendered":"

In these worrying times, we could all use a good laugh. So, having visited Victorian jokes in a previous post<\/a>,\u00a0here are a few more, from 1888.<\/p>\n

(I did point out in the previous post that humour really does change down the centuries: consider yourself forewarned).<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

1. The evil that men to lives after them. Even when an amateur cornet player dies, he leaves the instrument behind.<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

2. The head waiter at a certain summer hotel was called Topp, and the guests noticed if they wished for a tip-top dinner, they had to tip Topp.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

3. (a drunk falls asleep by the side of the road, moon above him, feet in a stream, and calls to his wife):<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cMargret, bring anither pair o\u2019blankets to pit on ma feet, and blaw out that cawnel.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

4. (A hedger giving directions to someone referred to signposts as \u2018ministers\u2019 and was asked why).<\/p>\n

\u201cBecause some of them are always pointing the way to other people, but never go themselves.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

5. \u201c\u2026.I worked harder to make the sale than anyone \u2013 in fact, I did all my own canvassing.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cWell, you could hardly expect a SALE without CANVASS.\u201d rejoined his friend.<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

6. A sentimental young lady asks: \u201cWhy is it that two souls, mated in the impenetrable mystery of their nativity, float by each other on the ocean currents of existence without being instinctively drawn together, blended and beautified in the assimilated alembric of eternal love?\u201d<\/p>\n

It is because butter is 18d a pound and a good sealskin costs as high as \u00a325.<\/p>\n

On a cold and frosty August night…<\/h2>\n

Rewind to August 1887, when the Penrith Observer<\/em> was reporting that: \u2018the Crystal Palace is recovering itself somewhat\u2019, \u2018the French propose a submarine tramway between France and England\u2019, and; \u2018the Thames and other rivers are becoming inurious to health\u2019.<\/p>\n

There was also dought in the Kendal district, and (surprising to read) \u2018a severe frost\u2019 on the night of August 13.<\/p>\n

This 1887 joke does have the merit of illustrating the attitudes in society about social class: the distinction between landed wealth and that earned from trade:<\/p>\n

7. Mr Smith: \u201cReally, Miss De Lyle, speaking of trade people coming so rapidly into our most select circles, do you know the father of our present charming hostess was at one time a cobbler? And I can distinctly remember when he made my father\u2019s boots and\u2026\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

Miss de Lyle: \u201cAh!, boots he wore while PLOUGHING, I presume.<\/strong>\u201d<\/p>\n

And moving into the 20th century…<\/h2>\n

If your sides aren\u2019t hurting too much from the above, prepare for tears to stream down your face as you read these corkers from 1914.<\/p>\n

8. \u201cHe knows all the best people in town.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy don\u2019t they associate with him?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThey know him.\u201d<\/p>\n

9. \u201cDad, are second thoughts best?\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cSo we are told, my dear.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cThen why don\u2019t people have them first?\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

10. New boarder: \u201cI didn\u2019t sleep well last night.\u201d<\/p>\n

Landlady: \u201cStrange bed, I presume?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, strangest bed I ever slept in.\u201d<\/p>\n

11. \u201cI don\u2019t think,\u201dsaid an old lady, \u201cthat book-keeping is a very sedative employment: there must be so much exercise in running up the columns.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

12. Overheard in an Edinburgh restaurant in the Bridges:<\/p>\n

Exasperated diner: \u201cLook here, miss, this coffee is simply like mud.<\/p>\n

Waitress: \u201cWell sir, it was ground this morning.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

In these worrying times, we could all use a good laugh. So, having visited Victorian jokes in a previous post,\u00a0here are a few more, from 1888. (I did point out in the previous post that humour really does change down the centuries: consider yourself forewarned).   1. The evil that men to lives after them. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":1274,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[123],"class_list":["post-1273","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-humour"],"yoast_head":"\nMore Victorian humour - Cumbrian Characters<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Further proof, if it were needed, that humour isn't fixed in time. 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